Parenting – Another Fine Art!

This has been weighing on my heart alot lately as we’ve struggled to make some currently big decisions, but then I remembered what I had once already realized; that as we become parents we come across many opportunities to decide how we want to parent.

  • Pre-Pregnancy
    • Birth Control – Which kinds we use, how long we use them, why we use them?
    • Children – How many children do you want, when do you want them, how close together do you want them?
  • Pregnancy
    • How we choose to eat, sleep, and exorcize?
    • If we work during pregnancy?
    • Do we see a Midwife, Dr, Nurse Practitioner, or anyone at all?
    • Oh and what furniture you do or do not buy to use.
  • Birth
    • Where – Home, Hospital, Birthing Center, or Elsewhere?
    • When – Do we wait for our bodies to go into labor naturally or induce?
    • How – Vaginally, C-Sections, On our Backs, On our Knees, In a tub?
    • Epidural or no epidural?
    • Room in? Room Out?
    • Do you let people visit in the hospital?
    • Cut cord right away, delayed, partial delayed, cord banking?
  • Newborn
    • Boys – Weather or not we circumcise?
    • Feeding – Nursing, Bottles, Both, Breast Milk, Formula, Both?
      • Nursing do you nurse in public? With Covers with out covers? Only at Home?
      • Bottles, oh goodness what kind?
    • Binkis – To use or not to use
    • Diapering – Cloth, Disposable, Both? Brands, Kinds, Wipes?
    • Do you stay in your house for a month or two months or do you leave your house 2 days later?
    • Who do you let hold your baby?
    • Sleeping – Co Sleep, Bed Share, Baby in its own Room? Sleep Scheduled or let Baby choose?
    • Vaccines?
  • Infant
    • Feeding – Breast Milk or Formula?
      • When do you add cereal?
      • When do you start Solids?
      • Do you make it or buy it?
      • When to start juice and what kind?
      • When to start cows milk and what kind?
    • Tummy Time, Crawling, Walking – Child Led or Parent Led?
    • Do you work or stay home?
    • Do you put your child in day care or not?
    • Is the nursery at church OK?
    • Do you use strollers, wraps, carries, all?
  • Toddler
    • Potty Training – Child Let or Parent Led
    • Do you use cloth or disposable training pants when that time comes?
    • TV or no TV?
    • Do we censor the radio?
    • Feeding
      • Nursing?
      • Pumping?
      • Cows Milk? What kind?
      • How, what, and when does your kid eat?
    • Again are you working or staying home?
    • Is your child in day care?
    • How do you discipline?
  • Preschool
    • Are you doing any preschool work at home?
    • Does your child go to preschool?
    • Do you do nap?
    • Same Feeding and Working questions?
    • Is your child potty trained yet?
    • How and when do they go to sleep at night?
    • Are they made to walk or ride in a stroller?
    • How do you discipline?
  • School Age
    • Homeschool, Public School, Private School, Boarding School?
    • Clubs or No Clubs?
    • Sports or No Sports?
    • Only Free Time, Only Scheduled Time, Both?
    • Eating – What, When and Where do they eat?
    • Working – Do you work or stay home once one or all your children are in School?
    • Bed Times?
    • Wake Up Times?
    • Can they Sleep during the day?
    • What do they have in their room?
    • Share rooms?
    • Chores?
    • Allowance?
    • How do you discipline?

These are obviously only a handful of the decisions you make as parents. But based on these decisions we tend to be lumped into certain groups that define the parent your supposed to be. But truth is noone really fits into all of any group. Most think of where they WANT to be but then adjust along the way.

There will always be someone who believes it should be done differently and that what your doing will surely ruin your child, but don’t worry it wont. No one knows your child like you do and chances are what worked for one of your children wont work for another and that’s OK. In the end there is NO right or wrong! We are all just trying to do the same thing: to raise our children to be good and fair adults. As long as what you are doing is not illegal then you should be the parent you want to be.


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